Ocean Spray: Crave the Wave.

I will grant you that cranberry juice is pretty freaking awesome, but I don't know if I would go quite so far out of my way just to get some.

(Again, issues with the YouTube framing...I'll work on it.)



I'm not sure if the current campaign (with the two cranberry farmers) is an improvement or not, really.

Gatorade is Thirst Aid...for that deep-down body thirst!

Before there was Michael Jordan, there were...normal people.



Now, compare that balding white dude with the "TV magic" no-look free throw to...Air Jordan? You can see why they made a change. Love the song, but...yeah.

Head for the mountains of Busch...beer!

Busch...the official beer of cowboys. Apparently.

(I apologize for the YouTube embed being a little off-kilter - not sure what's up with that.)


It's ironic that Coors, which is a beer that actually came from the mountains, didn't turn back to that image until much later. Busch, of course, is a beer that comes from St. Louis - which is not anywhere near a mountain that I know of.

Classic TV: Arthur Godfrey's Talent Scouts

Proof, as if you needed it, that nothing on TV these days is new. Long before American Idol or America's Got Talent, or even Star Search, there was Arthur Godfrey's Talent Scouts.



Brought to you by the good people at Lipton Tea...and Frostee desserts? Are those still around?

Lucky Charms: Magically delicious.

In the vein of the Trix Rabbit's fall from grace, here we see the very first cracks in the thin armor of Lucky Leprechaun.



 "A malt cereal with a delightful difference." And a wee bit o' sugar, eh, laddie?

Animation was reportedly performed by Bill Melendez, later of Peanuts (you know, Charlie Brown? Snoopy?) fame on television. I would suspect he also did the Trix ad seen previously, given the similarities and the sponsoring company (General Mills).

Cool Mint Listerine: Fights plaque, tastes like Cool Mint.

A pretty simple concept, actually: it's Listerine that doesn't taste like...burning. But the ad did an excellent job at making it seem like so much more.



Several interesting things about this piece.

• The song is "Tarzan Boy" by Baltimora, very much a one-hit wonder who got really lucky when this ad hit the airwaves.
• This was Pixar's second advertising effort, after their previous ad for Listerine featuring a boxing bottle (which I'll put up here at some point, too - I'd forgotten about that one).
• This ad has apparently been added to MoMA's permanent collection (though I can't find a reference to it on their site).
• Remember when the Listerine bottles were still made of glass? (At the end, the two bottles "clink" together on the tree branch.)

 The most fun you'll ever have with mouthwash.

Beggin' Strips: Dogs don't know it's not bacon.

This, to my mind, was one of the greatest ads of the 1980s. Pure genius.



The best line? "There...on that bag! What's it say? I can't reeeeaaad!"

Chiffon: It's not nice to fool Mother Nature.

A little scary, a little cute.



Also, please tell me we aren't feeding the forest creatures raw margarine. That can't be good for them.

Miller Lite: Less filling! Tastes great!

Yes, the slogan is obviously memorable, but I never realized how many big names appeared in these Miller Lite spots.



I'm not able to identify all of these people on my own (I'm not quite that old), but with the help of YouTube commenters, I can provide a partial list:

Dick Butkus (NFL player with the Chicago Bears, and the original star of this long-lived series of ads)
Rodney Dangerfield (legendary comedian and actor)
David "Deacon" Jones (NFL player with the Los Angeles Rams and originator of the "quarterback sack")
John Madden (NFL coach of the Oakland Raiders and, later, the namesake of the insanely popular Madden NFL series of video games and long-time television sports commentator)
Billy Martin (on-again/off-again manager of MLB's New York Yankees)
Lee Meredith (best known for her role as "Ulla" in Mel Brooks' The Producers)
Steve Mizerak (professional billiards player and trick shot artist)
John "Boog" Powell (MLB player with the Baltimore Orioles)
Charles "Bubba" Smith (NFL player with the Baltimore Colts and, later, an actor best known for playing "Moses Hightower" in the Police Academy series)
"Marvelous" Marv Throneberry (MLB player with the original 1962 New York Mets)

Anyone able to identify more?

Meow Mix: Cats ask for it by name.

Darned catchy little song, and one of those interesting ads in which the jingle is also the slogan (in a way). This ad is a newer version, rather than the 1980s original I wanted, but the idea is the same.



And who knew that cats could be translated so easily?

You're gonna love Hi-C.

Dum-doobie-doo-wah...



This one is a permanent part of my childhood, because it was included on a Beta (yes, Beta) tape of the movie Dumbo that I watched over and over again. Ah, memories.

Trix are for kids...or so you thought.

Shocking revelation! General Mills has been hiding the truth for years, and now it can finally be revealed: Trix are NOT, in fact, just for kids. This once-classified archival footage has surfaced, and I promise that you will be dumbfounded.



Of course, what you don't see is that the Rabbit succumbed to a violent stomach virus shortly after the completion of his daring, reckless feat. But his triumph shall not be forgotten!

Also, I like the fact that Trix is referred to here as the cereal with "real fruit colors" - because, as we all know, it certainly doesn't actually TASTE like fruit.

I'm a Toys 'R Us kid.

No, I'm not, actually. (When I was a kid, the going thing around here was Kay-Bee Toys.)


But it's hard not to know about the place if you ever watched Nickelodeon for any length of time during the 1980s-1990s, since they sponsored the annual "Super Toy Run" contest...


And yes, that is two videos in one post. I know, it's your lucky day!

You don't just eat your Dunkaroos.

Which raises the question - is there something else I'm supposed to do with them?



Dunkaroos, which are reportedly still available, were a staple school lunch addition during the mid-1990s. I only remember having eaten them once or twice myself - they're basically like Teddy Grahams with frosting dip. (That's a good thing, if you're confused.)

Of course, I'm sure most people remember the song more than they remember the snack - and to all the Australians in the audience, I'm continually sorry we Americans retain such a limited view of your culture. But thanks for (sort of) inspiring such an awesome snack, and another addictive jingle.

Juicy Fruit: Pop it in your mouth.

The 1980s - the decade in which marketing went nuts. Example one: Juicy Fruit, which was (is?) apparently the most exciting, active chewing gum ever made.



"Take a sniff / Pull it out" - was that required procedure? I don't remember a lot of people smelling their gum before "popping" it in their mouth.

There are more versions of this ad, of course - but this is the one that was stuck in my head all day today, for no particular reason whatsoever. And now it's stuck in yours. You're welcome!

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